Winter survival tips

A news story last week caught my attention as dozens of news stories tend to do on a daily basis. Some of them are amusing, others disturbing but this one caused a momentary shock of sympathy of the sort you might feel for a kitten stuck in a pipe.

Germans, Reuters reported last Sunday, were buying fan heaters to prepare for the winter and utilities were warning they could overload the grid. Leaving the comic element aside, Germans need help. And not just Germans. So I’m here to help with first-hand experience. Welcome to mъ extra-short but hopefully comprehensive guide to surviving winter.

Heating

Twenty-plus years ago, our household of two inherited a flat complete with an electric central-heating system. After a winter spent freezing and paying half of our income for electricity, we decided things needed to change. Both in our early 20s, we started experimenting.

Fan heaters

The worst possible decision. They only heat while their fan spins and immediately cease heating the moment the fan stops. Fan heaters are only good for one thing: fast but non-lasting heating of a small enclosed space. This has made them popular among street vendors (in tiny portable shops whose proper name escapes me right now) but they are not good for anything else.

Gas heaters

This was a much better solution to our winter problem than the fan heater. Yes, it was clunky and not exactly a sight for sore eyes plopped in the middle of the living room but it was heating this room and the cats loved it.

Unfortunately, we discovered the hard way something we already knew: the process of burning requires oxygen. The process of breathing also requires oxygen. With two people and three cats breathing in a room containing a burning gas heater, the heater would eventually shut down and not restart until we aired the room by opening the door to the balcony. We aired it all right. We also cooled it pretty efficiently.

Oil filled radiators

To this day, our second-favourite heating source. One of the two reasons our original electric system did not work properly was that the stationary radiators in our flat were located at the two opposing ends of the —rather large, I admit — living room. And they were small. The other reason was the system itself was very inefficient.

The oil radiators, conveniently portable, could be put right where you needed them and yes, they are not much prettier than the gas heater, but when you’re cold, aesthetics is among your last considerations, I promise. Your top consideration is getting warm and staying warm without having to rob a bank to pay your bill.

We still use the oil radiators to heat the bedrooms. They heat up a room, they keep it warm for as long as you need, they have adjustable temperature, and they shut down when they don’t need to work.

Convection heaters

I have no personal experience with them but I hear good things about convection heaters. A bonus: they are prettier than radiators and they can be put on the wall, saving space.

Gas-fired central heating

I only have episodic experience with this at my in-laws’ place and I’d say it’s pretty convenient if you live in a country that pumps its own gas. Elsewhere, probably not so wise, cost-wise, right now.

Air conditioner

This was our final solution for the living room in the city. We have never used the thing for cooling during the summer but it’s been on almost around the clock for the past ten years in the winter.

ACs are quick to heat, the room stays warm even if the AC is temporarily off because it has reached the temperature you’ve set, and they’re not a sore on the eye. But at least some of them need to “defreeze” once in a while during the coldest days.

I’m being assured that not all ACs stop blowing hot air and start panting like a tired dog, especially on a cold and foggy day, but ours certainly does. The technical mind of the family says it’s normal. The maintenance crew that visits once a year says it’s normal. I have to believe that it is, indeed, normal. It is also rather frustrating when it happens at 5:30 am in early January when you’d really like it to first heat up the room and then go panting.

Fireplace

The ultimate heater with the added benefit of creating coziness. Lots of it. Also lots of heat, enough to heat a whole (small) house. Yes, it’s a bit of work to feed wood to the fire but it’s work that pays off. And once a house — or a flat with a chimney exit — is heated, it stays heated for hours and hours.

Clothing

I see stuff like battery-powered self-heating jackets being advertised for nervous Europeans but I would advise against it. Not only do these products use valuable battery minerals that should be saved for EVs (right?) but they’re also not exactly cheap.

My tried and tested recipe for winter comfort contains four layers. It’s my interpretation of the onion approach to cold management that includes a vest, a T-shirt, a thin long-sleeved shirt and a sweater. No, it doesn’t make you look like the Michelin man. Yes, it does keep you warm in a room where the temperature’s 19 degrees Celsius for one reason or another.

I myself am partial to woolen sweaters for the top layer but polar fleece is also a great choice. It’s politically incorrect because it’s made from polyester but we live in an imperfect world and that’s something we just have to accept. Or be cold, of course, there’s always an alternative.

Cooking

I have seen some inefficient cooking in my time and its not something I want to see a lot more of. Basically, the rule everyone can try and use when cooking is the same rule that applies to every engine: it’s more efficient if it keeps running than it is if it stops and starts multiple times. And when you’re done, you can keep the oven door open to get some additional heat. Welcome to the multi-benefit world of cookery.